Friday, September 5, 2008

Moving on

I wrote this not long before JADED became JADED, and you can see why JADED became JADED and not JACK. (Aside from the fact that she already claimed the damn name - bitch.) I wrote this about some dude I met via the internet, whose face I have yet to see. Right - we never met in person, although we still talk even now after three years. In fact, we just had a text fight the other day because he pissed me off. I think he was still searching for an apology from that time TWO YEARS AGO when i asked him if he was HIV positive. It seems he didn't like my response - pssshhhh, I told him I wasn't apologizing for something I didn't feel sorry about and that my goddam right to ask. We didn't talk, errrr, text for like a week.

And it seems appropo right now since I got a call from him this morning finally owning up the the fact that he's not ready.

Your indecision

My mind absorbs the reality that
my heart has yet to accept
And here I go
yet again
experiencing the intangible
Feeling let down
And as I seek to splice
the disconnect within me
I accept
that it is me
who let me down
for believing it was you
who could answer my call

But I refuse to be jaded

I refuse to be jaded

I simply refuse
to give you the power
to determine my fate
to even have a say
in my destiny

I’ll rise again
Very soon
Sooner than ever before

And for the record, dear readers, I rose when I wrote this and I'll rise again.

And, as a side note, I'm watching you too, Mr. You Know Who You Are, still acting like you too good to comment on my blog. I'm not afraid to withdraw my endorsement. Just cuz I co-signed to this point don't mean I can't withdraw that signature.

*puts on shades and engages the side eye*


The Jaded NYer said...

OK- that is my new favorite video/song for the rest of the month of September, in honor of THAT motherfucker and now HIM.

And Mr. You Know Who You Are is hella close to losing my endorsement as well. Again.

*sings under her breath*
"It's not you... I hate everyone..."

JACK said...

*joins jaded's singing*

" ... fuck you in the fay-ace. fuck you in the face ..."

Anonymous said...

How do you find these things. That video was great. Your words are powerful, my friend.

One Man’s Opinion said...

Enjoyed the read...Loved the poem...Couldn't do to youtube video.

JACK said...

Anon: Thanks. I have tons of poems i've written in the last decade. But I don't blog them - that'd make for a boring ass blog. Just ask Don.

One man: Thanks to you as well. And what a pity about the video. It's GREAT.