Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Survey SAYS ....

I understand the importance of surveys - I really do. In the form of course evaluations, they serve me well in my line of work. And I know that the marketing people of the world just salivate at the thought of a 60+% return rate and all that raw data.

But don't ask me stupid shit, please. More importantly, don't ask me A LOT. I mean, I try to be sensitive to the fact that survey return rates are low and I try to be helpful when I can be ...

... but I just got a fucking survey from the CDC. Now, don't get me wrong - The Center for Disease Control is important as fuck. But a 15-page 141-question survey? Are you fucking kidding me? SERIOUSLY?!?!

I swear the CDC is trying to give me angina. Who was the marketing expert over there who said, "oh, 141 questions - that's PERFECT!" That bitch. I want to meet THAT bitch because I have some choice words akin to:

Look, numb nuts ... people out here are working for a living too. Yes, I know you poured your soul into creating that survey, but you need to step outside yourself for a minute or two. A ONE FUCKING HUNDRED FORTY-ONE question survey? Do you know how daunting that appears to the survey respondent? Do you know how those 15-pages yell at us, in almost an audible voice, "beaurocrats, red tape, dumb asses!" Do you know?

So, if any of you out there are creating surveys - keep it simple, keep it cute, and in the words of bon qui qui: don't get crazy.


The Jaded NYer said...

OMG- you do not have a video of Bon Qui Qui on here... I'm dying!!

and that survey sounds like something I would shred while watching a movie on my computer. Can you sign my name on the bottom of your angry letter? Thanks!!!

clnmike said...

Yeah thats way too much.

That sounds like some one needs to be paying me to answer the questions.