My alma mater

I don't usually talk about high school. There's college to focus on - so I don't have a high school ring. I did get a college ring, except I gave it to my cousin when she was the best (wo)man at my wedding. She was the best Best (Wo)Man I could have ever had ... I'm not saying we're trashy, ghetto bitches or anything, but she and I were both late to the wedding. Yes, folks, I was late to my own wedding. I stopped to get the bouquet, because this wedding was planned about as well as our Iraq war, and the bride had nothing to hold. But this bitch at the flower shop took her sweet ‘ole time. I called the church and the associate pastor says, “Let me get this straight – you’re late to your own wedding.”

Fucker.

Add this to the fact that my Best (Wo)Man had stuffed her bra with masking tape and you get the idea. We’re a straight mess. But I’m digressing.

My whole point here is this here quote published at overheardinny.com:

Elderly math teacher: By god, you can't just hand me any mangled piece of paper you want! What do you think this is, the Bronx High School of Science?
Geeky kid #1: Oooh, that's mean.
Geeky kid #2: Well, at least he didn't say Brooklyn Tech. They have cameras everywhere, and if you dis them, they'll take out their gun and be all, "What did you say about my school?"
Geeky kid #1: You just made that up.
Geeky kid #2: I wish.

--Stuyvesant High School

My, how I miss Brooklyn Tech …