Monday, December 1, 2008

Parents have sex!? ... and other eye-openers

So, I get this text message from a blog reader:

"Your blog is turning you into a voyeur"

Confused, I engage in a conversation asking him to elaborate. Because I really don't quite understand what the hell he's trying to say. Now, there are thousands of words in the English language that I do not know (as I was reminded this weekend while watching Akeelah and the Bee) but I think I have a pretty good grasp of "voyeur"

1: one obtaining sexual gratification from observing unsuspecting individuals who are partly undressed, naked, or engaged in sexual acts ; broadly : one who habitually seeks sexual stimulation by visual means

As I engage in this text conversation, I realize there must be another definition and there is, one that is not necessarily based on anything sexual:

2: a prying observer who is usually seeking the sordid or the scandalous

I suppose that once the term with a sexual connotation entered my brain, I stopped reading the dictionary. Aw well. But I fail to understand how this is necessarily a BAD thing. I mean, after all - it's MY blog, right? But I argue that my photo blogging of the ridiculous things I see is not the main focus of my blog, but rather just one of many threads, or labels, herein. I blog much more frequently about my babies and about how I just love being a daddy.

"Vulgar sexual details on one link. How much you love your kids a few paragraphs down. This is why Christians don't want gays to adopt."

Honestly, I can't remember where I have included my kids and any vulgar sexual details in the same post. If you find one, let me know. Those things are mutually exclusive, and as I said to this blog reader,

"it's really ok to be a sexual being and a parent ... it really is."

Did we all just forget where the fuck kids come from? Let's be honest, fucking feels good ... we all do it and all take it to varying levels of extreme. Raising kids is hard ass work, and I'm pretty sure that if fucking didn't feel so good we probably wouldn't opt to have kids. If having kids was akin to building an ark, I don't know anyone who would embark on such a three year project. 90+ % of the parents I know had UNPLANNED pregnancies ... you know what that means?

They planned on fucking their brains out. They may have used toys and lots of lube and might even have come out of it with an injury or two ... but no one *I* know planned to have a fucking kid. I'm not Catholic, never been Catholic and I'm a proponent of fucking for the sake of getting your rocks off, destressing, satisfying your addiction to orgasms ... I don't give a flying fuck. Just be safe, dammit - wrap your mother fucking partner in Saran Wrap if you have to ... but play safe and sweat like a whore in church, pull a muscle or sprain your wrist, invite three or four friends and come HARD .... or don't come at all.

All that said - and I'm still the best mother fucking daddy I know.

Even *if* I take pictures of people doing stupid shit and blog about them. And I maintain that if you're out in public, nothing you do is private ... even if you cower in the corner to do it.

You know what - fuck that. I'm the best mother fucking daddy YOU know.

And my camera stays at the ready ...

Now, re: Christians not letting gays adopt

JGC is not responsible for the narrowmindedness of Christians who love to point out the splinters in the eyes of others while ignoring the planks in their own. I'm pretty sure my Bible teaches that "all have sinned and come short of the glory of God" (Rms 3:23) and that includes pastors, deacons, ushers, reverends, priests ... every last mother fucking one of them Christians who pretend that my sin is greater than thiers.

By definition, sin is anything that separates you from God ... your white lie, or my swallowing - all the same in God's eyes. When you look through the pretentious, pious, ridiculous lens of Christianity ... you view sin categorically ... but none of my Bibles (not the KJV, the NKJV, the NIV, the Amplified ... nan a' one ah dem) explains that one sin is worse than another.

Remember Zipporah? Right, her sin was racism.

Remember how many people wouldn't vote for Barak because he's Black? Right, that sin is racism.

No better, no worse than Zipporah's ...

So, come at me with the whole Sodom and Gomorrah bit and about how I should suffer the same fate for being a faggot ... and I would like to point out that it's the same damn fucking shame that racists today don't meet the same fate at Zipporah. (*waves goodbye to West Virginia*)


We here at JGC know our Bible. We here at JGC know about religiosity.

And we here at JGC are NOT responsible for Christians not allowing gays to adopt.

We here at JGC have our own babies.

Carry on ...


The Jaded NYer said...

*dances naked all over JGC waving the rainbow flag*


How DARE they tell you what to do on your own blog... the NERVE!!!

If you step out of the house in gold stretch pants, purple Uggs and a white fur coat, and you're a DUDE, then you are BEGGING me to take your picture and blog about it- no if ands or buts about it.

so WHOEVER that fool was who told you all that mess can EAT A BAG OF CRABBY DICKS dipped in gonorrhea sauce.


JACK said...

uhhh - I'm pretty sure "eat a bag of dicks" would've sufficed there, young lady!

Marvalus said...

WTH?!? The nerve of some they gone tell you what to write/not write on your own shit?!

I think you are an amazing daddy from all of your posts that I've read...I even gave you an award for it; you can pick it up here:

Super Dave Van Buren said...

I'm just trying to figure out what that pic is... lol

Bangs and a Bun said...

Fuck that dude, whoever the hell he is.
And did Jaded really just say 'crabby dicks'?