Sunday, May 2, 2010

Post 325: Eulogizing JACK

Please continue to follow the spirit of JACK into The Refined Ghetto - but first, from the desk of The Jaded Nyer, the following:

Friends, Bloggers, Lurkers. It is with great sorrow that we gather here today to mourn the loss of our beloved friend Jack of Jack's Gay Chronicles. It is a day I feared would come and in fact has come too soon. But let us not mourn too long for Jack's death has made a way for Alex's birth; the true embodiment of the concept Mufasa taught us in the Lion King... the circle of life...

George Bernard Shaw once said: Death is for many of us the gate of hell; but we are inside on the way out, not outside on the way in.

And I think that was true of Jack. He was, in a way, in a hell of his own making, hiding behind the words on the screen, never really able to be out in the open. Never really free. I remember his frustration at not being able to say what he really wanted to say sometimes, and wishing I could say it for him because dammit- it needed to be said.

But now that he's free from the shackles and able to cut a fool down in that great big blog in the sky, I know that his pain is over. He is no longer silenced. He is no longer hidden. The emperor, my friends, has no clothes and frankly- he don't give a fuck.

I am sad to see my friend go; we had many a good time together. Threatened many a blogger together. Made fun of so many people together. Plotted against so many idiots together. And I am fearful that those days might never return.

However I will only mourn a day or two, for in my heart I realize that while Jack was the bees' knees, Alex is, in fact, the cat's pajamas. And the knowledge of that will comfort me every time I log on to the internet.

Fare thee well Jack, my love. May the gods of cyberspace serve you all the Captain Morgan your little liver can stand. I'll miss you.

******************

8 comments:

ƉƟѴІΞLΞΞ © said...

DRAMATIC UNNECESSARY OUTBURST**

"OH LAWD! HAWHY JEZAWS! WHY! OH LAWDY GEE..HE WAS SO YAWNG! HE WAS SUPPPOSED TO BUY ME EVERYTHING! UGH LAWDY GEE!!'

((FALLS OUT FOR ALL OF THE FUNERAL PARTY))

The Jaded NYer said...

*watches previous poster make a spectacle of himself*

SMDH... can't take Black people nowhere...

*looks around*

*joins in*

*dramatic wall slide*

Ay Dios mio prque? PORRRRQUE?!?!?!?! Make it not be true, make it not be true!! Take ME instead only, make it not be true!!!!!

*sobs*

The F$%K it List said...

*pulls Dovielle and Jaded NYer off the coffin* Can ya'll act like you have some sense? JEEZ LOUISE

Now turn to page 324 in your Hymnal and sing along:

"Blame it on the Goose, gotcha feelin' loose, blame it on Patron"... oh wait that's the wrong song! LOL

Glad to follow you to the after life my dear!

ƉƟѴІΞLΞΞ © said...

*GOES UP TO ALTER TO THE PODIUM TO ASK AN IMPORTANT QUESTION**

"EXCUSE ME!!"

*WAITS FOR ALL THE WAILING AND SNIFFLES TO STOP*

" THANK YOU, NOW I CAME IN HERE WITH A VINTAGE 1957 SNOWFLAKE PASSION BROOCH AND NOW IT IS GONE...NOW I REALIZE I MAY HAVE FLICKED IT OFF IN MY SORROW FILLED TIRADE..BUT I KNOW YOU FEWLS WERE NOT DUMB ENOUGH TO SCOOP UP MY SHIT AND TRY TO TAKE IT HOME...USHERS!!..LOCK THE DAMN DOORS...WE GON BE HERE WITH JACK TIL SOMEONE BRINGS MY SHIT BACK TO ME..OR EVERY BODY DIES!"

*OPENS JACK'S CASKET*

"AND YES THERE IS ROOM FOR ABOUT 15 MORE OF YOU WHEN I GET THROUGH"

**WAITS FOR SOMEONE TO BRING MY SHIT BACK**

The Jaded NYer said...

*dries tears*

*hides broach deep inside pocket book*

"Fool, ain't nobody take yo damn broach, shoooo!! Open these damn doors; I gotta go buy out the bar in memory of my beloved!"

aRm said...

Damn - ya make me sad I killed him off. This shit is crazy, and I LOVE IT!

ƉƟѴІΞLΞΞ © said...

**MAKES ANOTHER ANNOUNCEMENT**

"EXCUSE ME ONCE AGAIN...SORRY...BUT I JUST WANT ALL OF THE ELIGIBLE BACHELORS IN THE ROOM TO KNOW THAT I DO HAVE A FIRE DOWN BELOW....YOU SHOULD KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!!"

Wonder Man said...

we are ready for the real deal