Wednesday, October 21, 2009

The joys of parenthood


This was an interesting day. I drove back from Chicago last night, after a day's work, and listened to music the whole way. I really didn't do my ritual catching up with family and friends, driving with the cell phone to my ear like I was some Midwest Maria Shriver ... no, I just sat alone with my thoughts, singing into the windshield like it was begging for encores the whole three hours.

I just needed to clear my head of the noise, and make some of my own. In my car is the only place I really get ME time. For those parents out there, you TOTALLY know what I mean I say that behind the shut bathroom door is NOT no damn "me" time. It's in my car when no one is there but me behind some limo tinted glass.

Today was a typical day, riddled with work and errands. Ran to the bank - ran to the post office - had a lunch date at starbucks - got the mother in law some coffee and Newports because she was at work and didn't take her cash with her - and then went and got the kids.

It was so good to see them. I explained to them the plan:

  1. Go home and pick up that coupon for a 6.99 haircut so we can get that rag mop taken off my son's head
  2. Go to the Kiln store so we can pick up the ceramic heart jewelry box my daughter and I made together during daddy daughter day
  3. Go get my son his haircut
  4. Go home and eat dinner
They both agreed to the evening's run ... and off we went. Obviously, the ex-wife and I stay in touch about the chirrun' ... and so, I knew I had a question to ask. "So, baby - I hear you've been teaching the kid Spanish on the bus!"

*dead silence*

*immediately followed by a wailing daughter*

"What?"

**wailing**

So, my son pipes in and explains that his sister was teaching the kids on her bus some "bad" words in Spanish but he didn't know what they were. The problem with that was that it was my mission to find out what those words were. I calmed down my daughter and explained to her that I already knew that daycare had talked to her and that she and her momma had talked about it and that this was not a conversation about getting in trouble. I already knew that she already knew that she was not to do that again.

After some convincing, she told me what the words were. You ready for this blog family? Stupid. and Shut up.

Yes, folks, JACK's kids think that "stupid" and "shut up" are bad words - funny thing is that when I spoke to their momma about it (because I HAD to call the bitch when she texts me that my daughter told her I've been teaching her curse words in Spanish!) I told her that the only "bad" words I translated for her were stupid and shut up! Sure enough - that's what it was.

So, after she realized I wasn't going to beat her ass for it - she asked me not to tell her grandmother. Isn't she sweet? I agreed not to. I'll do it later, though. And grandma just won't be allowed to address it. But I'm so telling her about it. Too funny.

Then my son got his haircut - and he had the whole place laughing because it tickles when they buzz the back of his neck and he sits there with his shoulder hunched laughing his ass off ... and it's totally contagious. It really is! It makes me laugh sitting here remembering it! lol.

We got home - ate dinner (chicken soup and half a turkey sandwich - and root beer floats for dessert), they took their baths and it was quickly "relax time." I tested my daughter on her spelling words (test tomorrow), set aside tomorrow's clothes and they are right now fast asleep in their beds.

Oh - and that lion up there? My daughter drew it for me.

Life is totally fine right now.

4 comments:

Miss P said...

lol, i wasnt allowed to say stupid or shut up growing up. i remember once when i was 10 and my brother was 8, he heard me say shut up to someone and was like, 'i got you now. i'm telling!' i was so scared my momma was gonna whoop my ass, i didnt say anything for the rest of the day, lol.
your kids are too precious

Miss Snarky Pants said...

Kids say the darndest things!!! LOL

:-) @ your daughter asking you NOT to tell her grandmother about it and LOL @ you planning to tell her anyway.

Definitely a lot of joy in parenting...
A lot of joy indeed!!!

12kyle said...

Parenthood is sumthin else, ain't it? LOL

btw...thanks for coming thru to my blog with your kind words. I appreciate it.

The Jaded NYer said...

Stupid & Shut Up are not welcome in my house. From when K was little I treated them like curse words, telling her those words were "ugly" and had no business coming out of a young lady's mouth.

It worked.

You should see their faces when they say it accidentally. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA